Month: December 2016

In the beginning…

JW and I have been discussing the faithfulness of God throughout our life together. He reminded me that He was even there in our beginning, before we got married. So, I thought I’d share how we came to be one…

JW and I are fortunate to have our roots in high school. Were we high school sweethearts? Only briefly. We were more high school buddies. 

In my 10th grade year, I was dating a senior. He and I wanted to introduce our best friends. My best friend was another sophomore; his was a junior named John Wesley.

The night we met was fairly uneventful. I don’t believe in soul mates or love at first sight. Those things have no biblical basis, and actually are used by Satan to deceive people into being dissatisfied with their spouses and to pursue selfish and sinful paths. I do believe God has a plan for us though. And although neither one of us knew it at the time, God’s plan was for us to meet. 

My best friend and JW did end up going on one date. To say the least, they were incompatible, and so were me and my senior boyfriend. So, after the night we met, we thought nothing more of each other. Fast forward to the beginning of our next year in school. I’m now a junior and JW is the senior.

I remember JW was walking down the breezeway of our high school one day. I don’t think he saw me, but that day he caught my eye. I asked my best friend if it would be alright to talk to him. With her blessing, I pursued him. To this day, I can’t remember how I got his phone number or how we started talking, but we did. Our first date was homecoming. We took pictures and had fun. I liked him and he liked me, so we dated. About a month into our relationship, I decided that although he was a nice young man, he and I had different goals in life. (He wanted to settle down in our hometown, have kids, and lead a simple life; while I wanted to get as far away as possible from our hometown, never have kids, and travel the world!) However, just because we had different goals didn’t mean we couldn’t be friends, so we did. He became one of my best friends. We talked all the time, did all kinds of stuff together, and he even took me to prom. We got along so well, people wondered why we weren’t dating! In our conversations, we’d talk about a future if we got married, yet we remained just friends. 

Of course that changed after JW graduated and got a girlfriend who didn’t like our friendship. JW became distant and I became hurt and angry. I wanted everything to stay the same. I wanted him to play by my rules, to hold my hand when I was scared, but let me keep my distance when it got too serious. JW wanted a serious relationship that would lead to marriage. When he found that in another, we grew apart. I missed him, but we moved on. I ended up going to the same college he did, and would see him every now and then. We’d cordially speak, but we were no longer friends. Through those brief conversations, I knew he was still seeing the girlfriend. I wished him the best and kept going. 

Well, I kept going for 3 years. During that time I made new friends and dated other guys. I even got my heart broken by the wrong guy, but I was on my own path following my own plans when out of the blue God tells me to call JW. I ignored it. God told me again and again. He was so persistent that I got mad and told God He was crazy if He thought I was gonna call him! Well, God wouldn’t leave me alone. I figured John Wesley had married the girlfriend that hated me, so I was gonna call to get God to leave me alone and that would be that. I didn’t even have his number anymore. I had to call his parents (who always liked me) just to get his number. They were so happy I called that they both got on the phone! They gladly shared his phone number AND where he was living, what he was doing, the truck he was driving, and the time I needed to call him! (Geez.) I thanked them and told them I’d give him a call then. 

When I called later that night, I said, “Hey John Wesley, how are you doing?”

He said, “Good. Who is this?” (Really?)

I responded, “It’s Jennifer. Whatcha been doing?”

He replied, “Nothing. Jennifer who?” (Seriously??)

When I told him, I could hear the long “Ohhhh” as it dawned on him who I was. (Oh brother.)

After that difficult start to our conversation, the ice broke and we caught up from the past 3 years. He never did marry the girlfriend, was dating others, but nothing serious. That night we picked up our friendship where we left off as if we’d never stopped being friends. This time, though, we were older and had both experienced a lot of heartbreak that made us value the other more. The qualities JW possessed became what I was looking for, rather than what I wanted to avoid. God knew what He was doing, and I soon knew, too. I was to marry John Wesley.

And we did…6 months later. 

Just Breathe…

Jeremiah 32:27 (KJV) Behold, I [am] the LORD, the God of all flesh: is there any thing too hard for me?

I’m not sure if I’ve ever shared this revelation or not, but it was very significant in changing my view of God that perhaps I should designate its own post.

In 2012, while my husband was in the Far Country and I was desperately praying for the restoration of our marriage, I had this visual image in my mind of God. I thought God would have to rise up from His throne, take action, and change my husband’s heart. I didn’t think anything was wrong in that thought. Honestly, I didn’t even realize those were my thoughts until God pointed out the truth to me. God showed me that my thoughts of Him were truly small. I thought God would have to “do” something to change my husband.

He corrected me by telling me that all He would have to do is just breathe and all would change.

Whoa.

In the Spirit, I saw this big God who is so big and mighty that no mere man could make him move from His throne. God has to take no action. He wills it, and it comes to be. He thinks it, and it comes to pass. All He had to do was to take a tiny breath, and my husband would succumb to His will, and my marriage would be restored. He would be a changed man forever.

After that day, I was a changed woman forever. I saw how great God was and how small we are. I thought I believed that before, but that day God showed me my true heart. I’m so glad He did.

Without realizing it, we put God in a box with our preconceived ideas or our expectations of Him, when all He truly wants is to reveal His power and might. Don’t make God small. Open your eyes and heart and see how truly BIG our God is.

Jeremiah 32:17 (KJV) Ah Lord GOD! behold, thou hast made the heaven and the earth by thy great power and stretched out arm, [and] there is nothing too hard for thee

Isaiah 29:5 (NIV) But your many enemies will become like fine dust, the ruthless hordes like blown chaff. Suddenly, in an instant…

2 Samuel 22:16 (NLT) Then at the command of the LORD, at the blast of his breath, the bottom of the sea could be seen, and the foundations of the earth were laid bare.