Double Portion

Zechariah 9:12 (NKJV) 12 Return to the stronghold, You prisoners of hope. Even today I declare That I will restore double to you.

Isaiah 61:7 (KJV) 7 For your shame [ye shall have] double; and [for] confusion they shall rejoice in their portion: therefore in their land they shall possess the double: everlasting joy shall be unto them.
Today I read Zechariah 9:12 and was reminded of God’s promise to me while JW was in the Far Country. He gave me Isaiah 61:7. It’s similar to my last post about God blessing me with good for all the bad I was experiencing, but more specifically, “double.”

“Double” was something to which I could cling. I vividly remember being in so much pain the day after a distressing conversation with JW that all I could do was lie on the floor of my bedroom. JW had told me the OW was such a blessing, and he was full of so much peace with his decision to leave me for her. (Whew, it’s still painful to type that out after almost 3 years later!) As I lay there crying out to God, I heard Him say, “double.” I honestly thought God was crazy then. I asked, “God, how can You promise ‘double’ when JW isn’t home, or even wants to come home?” Silence. 

That’s where faith has to come in. God doesn’t lay out His divine plans to us step by step. He tells us the outcome, and we either believe or we don’t. I still thought God was crazy, but I chose to believe. You know, that sounds so pious, but really I didn’t have much choice. God showed me that my pain would still follow me even if I chose divorce and my own way. So I believed…I stayed on the floor for a few more days…but I believed. 

So, what is my “double?” When I got pregnant a month after JW came home, I thought it was having JW back and our son. Now we have two beautiful children. They could easily be our double portion after 10 years of infertility. However, we believe the Father will bless us with more children. Then, what is the “double” God promised? I think it’s all that I learned during such a painful journey and the rewards that came from obeying Him. I share this not to brag, but to share hope. If God can do it for me, He will do it for you! Just believe. 

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